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Not Gay Sex, Queer Erotic Worlds: An Interview with Jane Ward

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  • Hello and welcome to the latest
  • installment of Being Human from the
  • University of Pittsburgh.
  • This series is devoted to exploring
  • the humanities, their connections to
  • other disciplines, and their value
  • in the public world.
  • I'm Dan Kubis, assistant director of
  • the Humanities Center at Pitt.
  • My guest today is Jane Ward,
  • professor of Gender and Sexuality
  • Studies at the University of
  • California, Riverside.
  • Professor Ward's CV looks
  • unsurprising for a mid-career
  • academic.
  • It lists two books published by
  • university presses and dozens
  • of essays and articles in scholarly
  • journals.
  • Readers also get a sense for
  • Professor Ward's dynamic approach to
  • teaching through course titles like
  • Critical Approaches to
  • Heterosexuality and Freaks,
  • Sluts and Perverts: Sexual Others
  • in the U.S. Imagination.
  • What readers can't see on her CV is
  • the sensation that her last book
  • became when it was published in
  • 2015.
  • That book, Not Gay: Sex Between
  • Straight White Men, was widely
  • discussed on the Internet, reviewed
  • in places like Newsweek, Forbes, and
  • The Guardian, and was the top seller
  • on Amazon's gay and lesbian
  • nonfiction list for a time.
  • I suppose it also didn't hurt that
  • occasional grad student James Franco
  • put a photo of himself holding the
  • book on Instagram.
  • The book earned Professor Ward much
  • praise but also criticism and even
  • hate mail from people who objected
  • to her argument that sexuality is
  • culturally constructed rather than
  • determined by bio-evolutionary
  • processes.
  • In the fall of last year, she
  • published a follow-up essay in which
  • she discussed reactions to her book
  • and reasserted what has been a
  • fundamental commitment for her
  • throughout her career.
  • That is, liberating sexual practices
  • from narrowly understood categories
  • and opening up more space for queer
  • ways of life.
  • I began by asking Professor Ward
  • about what she was arguing in Not
  • Gay, and why it made so many people
  • so mad.
  • I started thinking about this
  • project about 20 years ago
  • when I was an undergrad
  • at a university in Southern
  • California, and
  • a straight white male friend
  • of mine shared with me
  • about a hazing ritual that
  • he had witnessed called the elephant
  • walk.
  • And in this ritual, which
  • I describe in the book,
  • fraternity pledges
  • take off their clothes, and
  • they walk in a circle
  • like circus elephants.
  • But rather than connect to tail to
  • trunk, they have their thumb in the
  • anus of the guy in front of them, or
  • they have their hand on the penis of
  • the guy in front of them.
  • There are different iterations of
  • this.
  • And when my friend told me about
  • this, I was
  • 21.
  • I was absolutely shocked
  • because I had certainly
  • never done anything like that with
  • women. And
  • I knew that if I had
  • done something like that with women,
  • that would be perceived as sexual.
  • And yet he was telling the story
  • to me as if
  • this was just
  • like tomfoolery.
  • Like it just it didn't have any
  • sexual content.
  • And so I was really struck by
  • the
  • disparity between
  • the kinds of intimate contact
  • that men can make-- that straight
  • men can make with one another, and
  • the kinds of intimate contact that
  • straight women can make and the
  • very different stories we tell
  • about that. And so,
  • fast forward to
  • the early 2000s, when
  • I started thinking about this book,
  • there was a lot of commentary in the
  • media about men of color on
  • the down low.
  • And at the same time, that
  • there was a bit of
  • a public health panic
  • about that or a moral panic
  • about black men having sex with men
  • and possibly spreading HIV
  • to their wives or girlfriends.
  • There was also a lot of interest
  • in girls kissing girls
  • and female celebrities doing
  • this and what this means.
  • And so, who is
  • absent in these
  • very high-profile stories
  • coming out in The New York Times
  • about these two phenomena?
  • White men, straight white men.
  • And I knew from
  • this past experience that straight
  • white men had their own version of
  • this kind of complicated, fluid
  • sexuality that no one was talking
  • about. So this becomes the
  • initial question for the book, and
  • I start out interested in
  • the kinds of loopholes that are
  • available to straight white men
  • to make sexual contact with other
  • men and still retain
  • their straightness-- their status
  • as heterosexual.
  • And so that's the driving question
  • of the book.
  • One of the central points in
  • it, I think, is that it does not
  • make sense, you argue, to
  • look at these acts and conclude
  • these are all closeted gay men.
  • Right.
  • Well, one of the misconceptions
  • about this book - I think
  • on the part of people who maybe have
  • read a blurb but haven't actually
  • read the book - is that this
  • is a book that
  • is about a particular
  • subset of straight
  • white men or some subgroup.
  • It's actually really about all
  • straight white men. It's
  • about hetero-masculinity in
  • particular or white
  • hetero-masculinity. And so
  • the reason I say that is that
  • the case studies that I'm looking at
  • are-- they're
  • examples of straight men
  • touching one another in sexual
  • ways as part of
  • the everyday life of
  • hegemonic masculine institutions,
  • fraternities, the military,
  • places that all men circulate
  • in. Of course, not all men are
  • in fraternities or in the
  • military, but we would be wrong to
  • say that those institutions
  • are populated only by closeted men.
  • So many
  • other scholars have looked at this
  • kind of behavior and
  • have called - mostly psychologists -
  • and they have called it situational
  • homosexuality or
  • deprivational homosexuality.
  • And they have all these theories
  • that men do this because they don't
  • have access to women sex
  • partners in prisons or in
  • the military.
  • But when you take all of that
  • research together, you find
  • that the
  • same logics that are at work
  • in the prison that
  • justify men touching each other
  • are also circulating
  • outside of the prison in
  • fraternities where men
  • certainly do have access to
  • sex with women and circulating
  • in public restrooms and in living
  • rooms. And so part
  • of what I do in the book is look at
  • all of this research that has
  • presumed that it was--
  • that makes conclusions based
  • on the particularities
  • of the specific institution
  • being studied.
  • And then raise-- when you look
  • at it all together, it raises some
  • other questions.
  • The main one, I think, or the most
  • important one, being what's going on
  • with straight men that every chance
  • they get to put their finger in each
  • other's anus, they basically
  • take it. That these opportunities
  • are manufactured across such a broad
  • range of institutional environments.
  • Yeah, well, one of the points that
  • you make in the book
  • was that the story
  • of heterosexuality in the 21st
  • century, you say, is about the rise
  • of bio-evolutionary accounts of
  • sexual desire. Right?
  • Yes.
  • And this is a very important point.
  • Why have those accounts
  • gained in popularity in recent
  • years?
  • Right. Right. So what we do see from
  • General Social Survey is that
  • the number of Americans who
  • believe that people are born with
  • their sexual orientation intact
  • or that sexual orientation is
  • congenital has
  • increased dramatically.
  • It started increasing in the 1950s
  • and has just gone up since
  • then.
  • I think the
  • reason for that is
  • that is the message
  • that has been promoted by
  • the mainstream gay and lesbian
  • movement. And so belief
  • that people are born
  • with a sexual constitution
  • and that they have no control over
  • that sexual constitution has
  • become associated with
  • being a good person, with being
  • an ally to gay-- to having
  • an open mind.
  • And so I think most people,
  • both gay and straight,
  • anyone who imagines themselves as a
  • straight ally, for instance, think
  • that that's the right thing to
  • believe. But interestingly,
  • what this biological turn
  • has also made
  • possible is for straight
  • people to imagine that
  • their heterosexuality
  • was also present at birth and that
  • it's fixed. There's nothing that
  • they can do about it.
  • And so, almost paradoxically,
  • what that means is that straight
  • people can engage in
  • homosexual behaviors
  • and think, "Well, you know,
  • I know I'm
  • biologically straight.
  • So that was just a circumstantial
  • aberration." And so part
  • of what I'm tracing is the way that
  • the the rise
  • of bioessentialist theories
  • of sexual orientation have actually
  • created more spaciousness
  • for straight people to temporarily
  • stray or to imagine that
  • they are acting
  • temporarily out of accordance with
  • their innate sexual constitution.
  • Yeah, but that's innate.
  • That's not going anywhere.
  • Exactly.
  • So there's no concern for it.
  • Yeah. Whereas in the past, your
  • homosexuality was
  • signaled simply
  • by your behavior.
  • So if you had-- if you had any
  • homosexual encounter, that meant you
  • were gay, whether you wanted to say
  • so or not. And now, we understand
  • most people believe that context
  • matters. So most people believe that
  • if a straight woman has a threesome
  • with another woman and her boyfriend
  • for his birthday, for instance,
  • that's not a sad story of her being
  • a closeted lesbian.
  • Instead, people take into
  • consideration all of the contextual
  • information, and they say, "Oh,
  • she's straight." Or maybe they say
  • she might have bisexual impulses or
  • something like that. But for the
  • most part, we provide
  • straight people now with many
  • loopholes that help to
  • preserve their heterosexuality even
  • as they make homosexual contact.
  • My favorite chapters in the book is
  • where you argue for an embrace
  • of queer erotic worlds.
  • Right? This is the thing that you
  • want your argument to be in service
  • of intimately.
  • And I wonder if you can say a little
  • bit about how your work complicating
  • heterosexuality here works
  • in service of embracing those
  • worlds?
  • I think part of what's
  • complicated about straight
  • white men's,
  • admittedly, kinky interactions
  • with one another is that,
  • at first blush, they do seem queer.
  • These are really
  • often very fantastical scenarios
  • in which men are topping other
  • men.
  • I'm often very impressed with how
  • elaborate these rituals are.
  • And I have a chapter that's about
  • Craigslist ads in which straight
  • men are seeking sex with other men,
  • and often these ads read
  • like very detailed porn.
  • They're just with costumery and
  • all that stuff.
  • So, again, one could
  • say, "Well, what's queerer than
  • this?" But the point
  • of the book is
  • that all of this is happening
  • in the service of heteronormativity.
  • These men are deeply, deeply
  • invested in being perceived as
  • sexually normal and
  • deeply invested in
  • living a heterosexual life.
  • They know that there is a queer
  • movement or an LGBT movement.
  • They want nothing to do with it.
  • It doesn't feel like home to them.
  • Being straight is where
  • their heart is, and it's certainly
  • where their politics lie.
  • So
  • for me, as a queer
  • person and as someone
  • who understands queerness
  • not as a
  • synonym for
  • homosexuality but as a political
  • orientation, a refusal of
  • gender and sexual normativity,
  • this, I think, helps to
  • push us.
  • I mean, already, we've been engaged
  • in this project of delinking
  • queerness from homosexual sex
  • practices.
  • And I think it helps to
  • illuminate the significance of that
  • even more that
  • there's no end
  • of sex practices
  • that can be folded into
  • heteronormativity or used in the
  • service of heteronormativity.
  • So what that means is that
  • the power of queerness-- it's
  • certainly about sex practices.
  • I'm not saying it's not, but it's
  • about the meaning of those sex
  • practices, and
  • what their use is, what
  • the context is in people's lives.
  • And so it's in that last chapter
  • that I'm reflecting on that.
  • Hearing you talk about this now
  • makes me recall the value
  • you put on sincerity in that
  • last chapter. It sounds now like
  • that's kind of what you're talking
  • about, like looking for a kind of
  • sincere queerness.
  • Yes.
  • Yeah. And I shocked myself
  • to even be saying that word
  • because, of course, you don't
  • think-- when you think queer, you
  • don't think sincerity.
  • And yet
  • one of the common threads for
  • straight men,
  • when they are touching other
  • men, is that they want it to
  • be made really clear that it is
  • meaningless and
  • that there's nothing--
  • not just nothing identitarian
  • happening there, like, what they're
  • doing should not be a reflection of
  • their identity, but also that
  • there's nothing of political
  • consequence happening there.
  • And I think queer people when
  • we fuck, we're pretty sincere
  • about the queerness and the
  • political nature of those
  • encounters. And when I'm talking
  • about queer, I'm not talking about
  • gay. I'm talking about queer.
  • So, yeah, I did want to
  • mind that
  • idea or that concept of
  • sincerity for its queer potential.
  • Yeah. I want to also ask you about
  • the reaction to the book.
  • There's been negative reaction to
  • it. You published on the negative
  • reaction, but also, we should say a
  • lot of positive reaction.
  • It's been nominated for awards.
  • It's been already translated into
  • German. I mean, I'd join
  • the people who think very highly of
  • it. But I want to ask you, even
  • before we get into kind of the
  • positive and the negative, I want to
  • ask just about the size in general.
  • What are your thoughts on why the
  • readership was so big?
  • Yes.
  • It was not unexpected for you?
  • It was unexpected.
  • I love projects
  • in which the main finding
  • of the project seems so obvious,
  • and yet no
  • one had talked about it yet.
  • And I think this book sort of
  • falls into that category that,
  • of course, this is happening.
  • It's happening all around us.
  • Straight men, sexual contact with
  • one another is everywhere and
  • nowhere.
  • And so I think it resonated on that
  • level of people wanting a framework
  • to make sense of it.
  • Also, it's
  • about sex.
  • And one of the
  • surprises for me is
  • that somehow
  • this book circulated
  • among gay men, nonacademic
  • gay male readers, with the hope
  • that it would be titillating,
  • that it would be-- that it was sort
  • of like gay porn.
  • And I think many of them were
  • disappointed to discover
  • my feminist analysis running
  • through this book alongside the hot
  • images.
  • It's a buzzkill as you write in your--
  • Yes, yes.
  • So yeah, I mean, I heard--
  • setting aside the academic
  • responses, which were mostly
  • positive and constructive, I
  • heard from many
  • gay men, who are
  • outside of the academy, and
  • straight men and
  • straight women.
  • And the nature of those
  • responses were all very different.
  • I heard from many gay men who hated
  • this book and who
  • expressed their outrage,
  • often in quite misogynistic
  • terms. And then, many
  • straight men who loved
  • this book and wrote to me with
  • detailed and very juicy
  • confessions of their
  • sexual encounters with other men.
  • And then, many straight women
  • who were partnered
  • with men that they thought might be
  • having sex with men
  • and who, for the most part, were
  • quite heartbroken about it.
  • And so,
  • the intensity of the feelings
  • around this book,
  • I wasn't quite prepared to deal with
  • it, in part because many of the
  • people writing to me what they
  • really needed was psychotherapy.
  • What they needed was some sort of
  • emotional healing.
  • So, yeah,
  • it was really fascinating.
  • That reminds me, you were actually
  • invited to go on television shows,
  • right? In the role of a therapist
  • after this.
  • Yes. Yes.
  • I don't watch TV, so when
  • I got these requests, I'd have to
  • Google and find out what on earth is
  • this. But one daytime talk
  • show called The Doctors asked me
  • if I would be
  • on the show to talk to wives
  • about how to relate to their
  • husbands or boyfriends--
  • how to relate to the discovery that
  • their husbands, their boyfriends
  • were having sex with men.
  • Of course, that is really out of my
  • wheelhouse.
  • Well, so you published an article on
  • the reactions in
  • fall of last year.
  • And one of the things that I found
  • really interesting that you did in
  • that piece was reflect
  • on your method of
  • writing in the book.
  • And you write a little bit
  • about the-- or you defend
  • the humanistic and
  • cultural studies approaches that you
  • take against approaches that
  • are based in biology or quantitative
  • social sciences.
  • Did you expect to do that?
  • Did you expect to have to defend
  • that method in that way because
  • you're trained in sociology?
  • I mean, how did that come about?
  • I did.
  • And I didn't expect that
  • sociologists would love this book
  • precisely because of
  • its cultural studies
  • methodology. Often
  • in the social sciences, truth
  • comes out of the mouths of people
  • that you interview or who fill out
  • your survey. This is the
  • presumption. And so,
  • you're going for reproducibility
  • and generalizability.
  • And so there's
  • not a lot of nuance.
  • It's also very difficult with
  • social science methods to capture
  • contradictions
  • in the way that people understand
  • themselves.
  • Because if you're relying on
  • self-reporting--
  • had I had gone out and said,
  • "I want to talk to
  • straight-identified men who have sex
  • with men, or I'm looking for men
  • having sex with men," I
  • would have been sitting in gay bars
  • with no one talking to me.
  • It would have been very challenging.
  • And so, instead, I made the decision
  • to look at
  • a number of case studies,
  • some historical, some
  • contemporary.
  • So the book has
  • a very eclectic archive.
  • I am looking at personal
  • ads and media
  • coverage.
  • I chose those methods because
  • it really gave me the long view
  • on this question: how
  • have a broad
  • range of stakeholders, not just men
  • themselves, engaged in these sex
  • practices, but how have sexologists,
  • psychologists, sociologists,
  • filmmakers, how have we
  • collectively
  • come to understand what
  • sexual fluidity is
  • and how it's different when we
  • are thinking about
  • women's sexuality and men's
  • sexuality, white people's sexuality
  • and men of color's sexuality.
  • And those questions
  • really lend themselves to
  • humanistic methods.
  • Another kind of method question that
  • I was interested in has to do with
  • your investment in post-structural
  • theory. Some of the negative
  • reactions that you got specifically
  • reacted to that.
  • Called you a minion of Judith
  • Butler? That example is one of the
  • many things you got.
  • Sure. I'll take it.
  • Yeah.
  • I'm wondering whether you
  • think at all that some of the
  • reaction to, especially from
  • gay men,
  • who you see as being
  • upset that they've been decentered
  • by this work in queer studies.
  • Is it possible to see negative
  • reaction to your book as part of a
  • broader reaction to
  • post-structuralism based on the fact
  • that if we take post-structuralism
  • seriously, then nobody's at the
  • center?
  • Sure, absolutely.
  • I mean, I think people like
  • accessible and legitimizing
  • scholarship. And
  • sometimes, it's white people
  • who want that.
  • Sometimes it's men who want that.
  • Sometimes it's gay men who want
  • that. I think that many people
  • don't understand the tenets
  • of post-structuralist theory,
  • and they don't understand the
  • methodology that people might
  • use to
  • work in and through a
  • post-structuralist frame.
  • And so I understand the feeling
  • of it being inaccessible.
  • Certainly, as a sociology graduate
  • student, I felt that way myself.
  • And so I actually feel
  • like part of my work or one of my
  • aims in my work is to translate
  • humanistic queer scholarship
  • for a broader audience.
  • And I think I
  • do that fairly well.
  • I try to do that.
  • So in that regard, I was actually
  • disappointed that people had
  • the reaction that they had
  • because I felt like I
  • was working
  • in a liminal space
  • between a more humanistic framework
  • and a social science framework.
  • I also think gay men, in particular,
  • were angry because
  • there's still a sense among many
  • gay white men that
  • they are entitled to the privileges
  • of white masculinity, and they've
  • been denied those privileges as
  • a result of being gay.
  • And so any framework
  • that will help to restore
  • their male privilege and
  • any scholarship that does that, they
  • would prioritize that over
  • scholarship that deconstructs
  • sexuality or deconstructs gender
  • or puts women or people
  • of color at the center.
  • And they basically said
  • as much in their responses
  • to me that they felt like
  • gay and lesbian studies had
  • really deteriorated
  • with the centering
  • of trans
  • and dyke theorizing.
  • Yeah. I also want to ask you about
  • your first book, Respectively Queer.
  • In the beginning of Not Gay, you
  • kind of look back, and maybe it has
  • to do with the sociology-- it's
  • a revision of your dissertation.
  • So maybe it has to do with that kind
  • of disciplinary background, but
  • you kind of look back on it and say
  • it didn't really feel totally like
  • it was yours, whereas Not
  • Gay does feel more like that.
  • You're more excited about it.
  • Still, I saw a pretty
  • clear continuity in terms of your
  • interest in recalling radical
  • impulses in queer politics
  • there. Do you also see it?
  • I mean, is that--
  • I do, yes.
  • Yeah. So that book is about the
  • corporatization of
  • queer organizations.
  • And I was living in L.A.
  • at the time, so I was looking at
  • three L.A.-based organizations.
  • But the story that I told is
  • a story that's happening nationally,
  • that as these LGBT-- what
  • were once grassroots organizations
  • populated by like a ragtag
  • crew of queer activists,
  • they've institutionalized
  • and now they're recruiting from
  • the private sector to get
  • their development directors and so
  • forth. And so you go into these
  • places, and they're basically gay
  • incorporated.
  • You might as well be in a bank.
  • And in fact, the L.A.
  • Gay and Lesbian Center is in the
  • former IRS building, and that's
  • precisely how it feels.
  • So, yeah, absolutely.
  • That project felt urgent
  • to me as a description
  • of the mainstreaming.
  • And, really, I didn't have quite the
  • language for this at the time, but
  • it's the neo-liberalization
  • of the queer movement that I'm
  • trying to document there.
  • And yet, because I was
  • a sociologist, I'm feeling
  • compelled to rehearse social
  • movement theory and organizations
  • theory. And I would have told that
  • story differently now.
  • One thing that book raised for
  • me was about you
  • and your existence in a university.
  • I assume that UC Riverside,
  • your home institution, like every
  • university, declares
  • diversity to be a
  • fundamental goal of what it wants to
  • promote on campus and things like
  • that. Have you been involved
  • in any of the university-level
  • efforts to promote diversity on
  • campus? Because it seems like you
  • would be in an interesting position
  • with regard to those efforts.
  • On the one hand, you worked so much
  • on diversity. On the other hand, the
  • particular kind of work that you do
  • seems like it might not fit so well
  • with that.
  • Exactly, yes.
  • I'm so glad you're asking me this
  • question.
  • So, UC Riverside
  • is a unique campus
  • nationally in that it's about 70%
  • students of color.
  • And I would say
  • an even greater percentage of
  • students of color take
  • Women and Gender Studies courses.
  • And so, on the one hand, it
  • means that a kind of
  • racial justice framework
  • is already
  • present in, I think, most classrooms
  • because the students bring it.
  • They come to the classroom
  • with a lot of critical thinking
  • skills around
  • race and socioeconomic
  • class.
  • And so the campus has no choice
  • but to rise
  • to the level of expectation, I
  • think, around those issues.
  • Queerness, on the other hand,
  • I've been really
  • fascinated and completely
  • depressed to observe that
  • the kind of queer
  • scholarship that the campus is
  • comfortable promoting
  • or publicizing in its development
  • materials and so forth
  • is queer scholarship that focuses
  • on a tragic story.
  • So if you
  • publish work about homeless
  • queer youth, if you publish
  • work about intimate
  • partner violence in queer
  • communities,
  • that is perceived
  • as not threatening because it's
  • rehearsing the tragedy of
  • queerness. But if you write about
  • queer pleasure, God forbid,
  • or
  • if you want to tell a story about
  • the kind of sex practices that queer
  • youth are engaged in.
  • In other words, if you want to talk
  • about how young queer people
  • live as opposed to how they kill
  • themselves, then that's going to
  • make your campus uncomfortable.
  • And I think we really need to be
  • calling them to task.
  • I know this is not specific to my
  • campus. And so
  • why this--
  • not just addiction, it's almost like
  • a fetish for queer trauma
  • that I think is
  • one manifestation of
  • heteronormativity that we can
  • see very clearly at the university.
  • Yeah. Well, I want to ask you about
  • one other focus of yours
  • in your work, and that is parenting.
  • You've written a lot about-- you've
  • published essays. You also have
  • written a lot of blogs that I really
  • enjoyed reading about genderqueer
  • parenting practices and also, in
  • particular, encouraging children's
  • right to self-determine gender.
  • And you work with-- you work with
  • other parents and talk with them
  • about ways that they can create
  • environments that allow children
  • to do that, too.
  • What are some of the things that you
  • talk to parents about doing to
  • create that kind of environment?
  • Yeah, so two main things.
  • One is gender
  • salience.
  • So I think often
  • there's a confusion about
  • whether gender is relevant in
  • a particular situation.
  • And parents, not just parents
  • but also teachers, can get kind
  • of stumped around this.
  • So when you need
  • to take your class of students and
  • divide them into two groups,
  • do you really want to be saying boys
  • and girls? Because part what you're
  • communicating when you do that is
  • that gender difference is
  • so salient, that it's so significant
  • in your mind as this formative adult
  • that it is the easiest
  • and first and foremost way
  • that you're going to differentiate
  • between people.
  • And, of course, we understand that
  • we would not say, "All right, kids,
  • separate into whites and browns."
  • We understand the damage
  • that that would do. And yet,
  • somehow, that's still quite
  • normalized around gender.
  • So for me,
  • it's important that
  • parents recognize that not
  • doing that isn't just something
  • that's relevant for parents with
  • trans or genderqueer children.
  • It's vitally important
  • for all of us because this
  • is where that foundation
  • gets laid for
  • boys, in particular, to feel quite
  • alienated from girls.
  • And then, by the time they get to
  • college, and they start raping
  • girls, we wonder what happened.
  • These were great young men.
  • Well, what happened is
  • that you started separating
  • and then dehumanizing or alienating
  • boys and girls from one another.
  • So distinguishing between
  • when it's really, really unnecessary
  • to gender children and then
  • environments in which gender
  • does feel more relevant.
  • Like when you're talking about a
  • child's body with the doctor, how
  • to do that without presuming their
  • gender identification if you don't.
  • So this is gender salience.
  • And I also work with parents around
  • genderqueer celebrations.
  • So that it's not
  • celebrating queerness, queer
  • history, queer
  • accomplishments, the beauty of
  • queerness is not just for queer
  • parents. It should be for all
  • parents in the same way that we
  • introduce children to
  • books and things from other
  • cultures. I'm an advocate
  • that we do that around queerness as
  • well.
  • Yeah. And one of the points that you
  • made on your blog that I found very
  • interesting is that if you're not
  • proactively doing this, then the
  • default is heteronormativity.
  • Exactly.
  • Well, so your current work is titled
  • The Failure of Heterosexuality: How
  • Sexism Doomed the World's Most
  • Cherished Union and Hid the
  • Wreckage. How's it coming?
  • Well, one thing I can say is
  • that I'm having so much fun writing
  • this book.
  • Oh that's good.
  • It's just been so
  • pleasurable.
  • It's coming along.
  • I mean, I'm in the early stages with
  • this book. It's again
  • a strange archive.
  • So the basic
  • argument in this book, it's
  • a bit of a rant, but it's that
  • despite the story we tell about
  • the tragedy or in contrast
  • with the story we tell about how
  • tragic and difficult it is
  • to be queer, that in my own
  • life and for many, many queer
  • people, we witness
  • the miseries, the utter miseries
  • of heterosexuality and feel profound
  • gratitude that we have escaped them.
  • And so this book
  • is about me documenting
  • those miseries through a
  • queer lens, through my own queer
  • lens.
  • And to do that, I'm
  • looking very closely at what I call
  • the heterosexual repair industry,
  • which is as
  • straightness repeatedly fails
  • to function or to deliver
  • on the promises of heteronormativity
  • as straight relationships fail to
  • deliver, we see all
  • of these-- an industry emerge
  • to help smooth that over
  • for straight people or to justify it
  • or to distract from it.
  • So I'm looking at doing a kind
  • of a 20th-century survey of
  • self-help books for straight
  • people, mostly for married people.
  • I also spent three years-- there's
  • an ethnographic component to this
  • book. I spent three years
  • inside the pick-up artist
  • and seduction community,
  • which started out as a community and
  • now really is an industry.
  • So whereas the self-help books are
  • often-- the target audience is
  • women, men now
  • are the consumers
  • of what are often called seduction
  • boot camps. So they'll spend a
  • weekend paying somewhere between
  • $1,500 and $3,000 to
  • learn how to seduce
  • women. I also did some
  • interviews with queer people
  • about what they
  • dislike about straight people
  • and straight culture.
  • And then, I kind of wrap
  • the book up with some reflections on
  • what I call deep heterosexuality
  • or what heterosexual
  • justice might look like.
  • Talking about writing about the
  • positive experiences that
  • you've had, being queer reminds
  • me of what we were talking
  • about on the university campus.
  • That's kind of like promoting those
  • stories or things that could help on
  • those campuses and in a lot of
  • spaces.
  • I know. And it's amazing.
  • I mean, my work has
  • been persistently
  • unfundable.
  • And so I'm just so struck
  • by how many people
  • seem to like my work and want to
  • read my work. But, certainly, my
  • university doesn't want to promote
  • my work, and no one wants to fund my
  • work. And so
  • something is going on here around
  • what we consider to be
  • urgent scholarship
  • and scholarship
  • that we should throw money behind.
  • And I think often the feeling is
  • that tragedy
  • is where it's at.
  • And so, in a way, it's almost a kind
  • of cheeky play on a little joke with
  • myself to say, "Okay, well, I'm
  • going to write about the tragedy of
  • heterosexuality because that's the
  • tragedy that I see."
  • Well, that kind of turning the
  • tables worked really well in Not
  • Gay. It's a really great book, and
  • I'm sure we all look forward to your
  • coming book as well.
  • Thank you.
  • Jane Ward, thanks so much for being
  • here.
  • It's my pleasure.
  • That's it for this edition of Being
  • Human.
  • This episode was produced by Matt
  • Moret, Undergraduate Media Fellow at
  • the University of Pittsburgh.
  • Stay tuned next time when my guest
  • will be Mabel Wilson, professor of
  • Architecture at Columbia University.
  • Thanks for listening.